Friday, September 18, 2009

7 sleeps

Lord give me strength!

This week’s meal plan has been TOUGH, full of ups and downs and having to take each day (hour, meal, training session) as it comes. I did get my small serve of oats back for brekkie (thank goodness- I almost go into zen like state when I eat them) however the fun certainly ends there each day L I am counting down not only to the show next Saturday but to the day next when I get to start carbing up!

I’m grateful that I don’t have to endure this ‘final stretch’ of the diet any longer than I do because ive been wondering at what point of this diet would I really start overthinking/dreaming/becoming a little obsessed with food eg what I’m going to ho into next Saturday night and Sunday after the show! All in all, I am happy with the decision not to come in any leaner than I will be especially for my first show, as I may have just traded my marbles for a few more ml! :S

These thoughts can be a little frightening, especially when they come out of nowhere but its not at all surprising when the diet is this restrictive and unbalanced. Its interesting when you think about it, my head is longing for foods that will give me the quick fix and rush of a happy hormones release (serotonin, dopamine etc) which happen to be simple carbs (SUGAR) and fat whereas, I know that more importantly, my body is crying out for healthy fats and lower GI carbs. When I look in the mirror and wistfully think I could maintain this shape I stop and think of these physical symptoms- My memory and concentration are poor, skin and hair are dry, joints are clicking, cracks in my tongue etc etc. Not that I have been thinking this everyday of course, remember the mind plays tricks- I’ve lost 16kg all up and every second day is still a ‘fat day’ which can drive you nuts if you let it too.. Glamorous hey?

Being very aware of my thoughts and feelings helps immensely. Understanding that they are stemming from a physical response to nutritional deficiency helps me observe my thoughts rather than let them take over.

So that’s my wrap up of what appears to be a ‘2 week out low’ I must endure before at just one week out I presume (hope) that BANG you turn another corner and there’s that light at the end of the tunnel. Cue nerves and excitement…. Right now is a perfect time to remind myself how much I have learned about self-discipline and restraint..


Anonymous said...

the last few weeks of prep are so hard and you question WHY THE HELL you are doing this to yourself. The answer will be given to you the moment you step on stage with the bright lights in your eyes and a smile you just can't hide. Your hard work has paid off and it is YOUR day. You will do awesome :)

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